Teenage dating jealousy
I turned and asked her, “Do you want me to listen to you?” She shouted, “Yes.” “You have to stop hitting me and stop shouting and then I will listen to you.” She kept hitting me and shouting, “You must listen to me – only me.
She was in a full-blown tantrum, eyes streaming, nose running, throat screaming and arms flailing.Never did I see her parents enjoy being with her for the joy of her company.Never did I hear them appreciate her for who she was; though she earned plenty of praise for her many academic and co-curricular achievements. He wants to be valued first and foremost for the person he is, and only then for things he has ‘done’. How your child feels is the ‘truth’ for him, and that is what determines his behavior. Come back, I haven’t finished…” 🙂 And then you wring your hands and complain to anyone who will listen and lose sleep at night that your children are jealous of each other! Pay each child enough attention – they may want different types of attention.A recent, disturbing study reported that approximately 20 percent of over 4,000 girls surveyed, age 14-18, had been shoved, hit, slapped, or forced into sexual acts by their dates.The data collected was part of the Massachusetts Youth Risk Behavior Study conducted in 19.When she had quieted down to the occasional sob, I pulled away, and asked if she was feeling better. “You hurt me when you pulled my scarf, and when you were hitting me and shouting,” I told her. She insisted that she wanted to be the closest to me: “You are my favorite, and I have to be your favorite too.” I told her things didn’t work that way. We settled for peace, and the rest of the evening passed off uneventfully. But despite that, the child was jealous, because she didn’t get enough from the parents.
It was almost as if she were a nuisance, who had to be controlled before she got out of hand.
After catching my breath, I told her that she had pulled the scarf so tight that I had had difficulty breathing.
Her response: “I’ll do it again if you share secrets with anyone but me. You are NOT to be anyone else’s special friend – only mine.” I ignored her, and turned to the child who had been whispering in my ear.
Even if he is a single child, with no other ‘competitors’ for his parents’ attention, he will feel the emotion of jealousy – though he might not express it.
But the moment his parents focus their attention on another child, sibling or not, this jealousy is expressed.
Either their child is jealous, or else they have experienced jealousy themselves as children.